When I'm not writing bondage erotica, my mind remains a cornucopia of miasmic frenzy where torrents of ideas and notions surge and dash like the floodwaters that swamped New Orleans -- only less muddy and generally less expensive to clean up after. Here, for absolutely no charge, you may read the articles, reviews and essays that spring forth from my mind like spring-loaded cats in a grade-B horror movie. Please, do not try to compensate me. The heartfelt thanks of a grateful world are more than enough for me.

As for the new "Departments" section, it's been long overdue as some topics have produced many more articles than others. The new department, "Celebrity Bondage" is for the convenience of those are searching for particular celebrities in bondage. There are about a dozen celebrities listed at present, but there will be more ... many, many more.

From the Victorian times to the 80s the Sex Wars have raged in America. From the brutal depredations of Anthony Comstock to the sly mischaracterizations of Catherine MacKinnon, the Sex Wars have influenced and shaped American culture. Now I have come to illustrate and describe, in a completely biased and nonsensical way, these wars! Be afraid ... be very afraid!

A brand new  department, Celebrity Slave Girls. We're unhampered by the thought that there are no Celebrity Slave Girls in real life, because plenty of hottie celebrities have dressed up in ways that make the slave girl fantasy fuel, and we've got the goods!

It occurs to us that we have not yet written a brief visual history of Pony Girl. So here it is! We also explain the origin and purpose of the bustle, and it's relation to the Pony Girl phenomon, and why all those women photographed in the bustle era wore the same expression.

New from GorCo, it's Kajira, the doll for every little girl's most private, most heartfelt dreams! This doll is FULLY poseable, anatomically correct, and politically incorrect! And the price: you CAN'T HANDLE the price! It's THAT low!

In March 2012, Disney Studios is coming out with a movie based on Edgar Rice Burroughs' novels about John Carter of Mars and his hot-blooded Martian princess Dejah Thoris. In the books, Dejah ran around pretty much naked, like most Martians. We don't think Disney is likely to get that right. So we've started a new department to help them out with lots of images of hot, naked, chained Dejah Thoris.

Yes, I'm now the proud author of Slavegirls In The Movies and on TV: The Hottitude of Servitude, which is widely considered the most unnecessary book written in the last three decades, hence ... a SURE best-seller!

A group of images thave have mystified us ... well, me at least ... because no one knew its origin ... is at last identified! A riveting example of a brilliant mind solving a mystery that no one else knew existed! 

Rebecca Love has a great handcuff scene in this Skinamax spoof, better even than the one in "Over The Wire, because this one has ... lighting.

Hilarity Clanton, former First Person of the United States, is Anne Coaltar's old enemy -- and now she is First Girl in the slave kennel in which Coaltar finds herself. Fortuanately ... well, there's nothing fortunate going on for Anne here ...

Is Anne Coaltar doomed to a fate worse than death? Well, if you've read Pat Powers' stuff before, you'll know that fates worse than death are commonplace with him. But ... is there a fate worse than a fate worse than death? Find out ... maybe ... in Chapter 3.

Has Anne Coaltar survived death in Chapter 1? The fact that there's a Chapter 2 should be a bit of a clue on that issue. But what further perils will Anne face? Was it just one hell of a party, or is something else going on?

The first chapter of the first book in the Lotharionian Epic Cycle Saga Series is approporiate called "The Beginningnation" and deals with what happens when Ann Coaltar wakes up naked and chained to a rock after what was apparently one hell of a party, and meets up with two Renfair types.

Feast of Souls is a pretty damn good Andre Norton-ish high fantasy novel that contains no bondage or even any maledom/femsub scenes, but it sure could have used a few. I explain how and why.

Holly Hunter. Nude. Bound. Fucked. On a non-premium cable TV series. Ain't life grand?

Tiffany Fallon appears on the cover of the February 2008 issue of Playboy in a painted-on Wonder Woman suit and the anti-sex feminists go through the roof!

We review this hentai series because it is the perfect thing to watch on TV while doing other stuff. This is NOT intended as an insult -- it's really hard to find something that fills that bill.

Up and coming star Carrie Genzel stars in a topnotch women in prison movie that includes a nude catfight/lesbian rape scene for Ms. Genzel.

The progenitor of the modern women in prison flick features a luscious Linda Blair being lesbianically dommed by a smokin' hot Sybil Danning. What's not to like?

Perhaps the nakedest women in prison film ever because it introduces the wonderful concept of in-cell nudity! Probably got it from the white slavery films. Good move.

Read my women in prison themed short story "Doin' Time In the Blue Shadows" and tell me if I can walk the walk as well as talk the talk.

Commercial bondage videos OUGHT to be my favorite genre of women in prison themed video stories. But they aren't, and Prison World is a perfect explanation of why not.

We think we have photographic evidence that she did. But then, we also think that robots are stealing our luggage. But this is probably more than the harebrained malarkey it looks like ... well, we'd like to think that.

Conan is not into bondage, not by a long shot, but the world he lives in is ... VERY into bondage. And the incredibly well made Savage Sword of Conan series, newly issued in trade paperback by Dark Horse, makes it very clear.

This hentai attempts to be a humorous story about a nurse in training whom EVERYONE wants to rape. Male, female, young, old, they all press their unwanted sexual advances on her virginal self. It's billed as a comedy, but it's not funny, which is ... a bit of a problem.

In which we seek an answer to this perplexing question.

This week, a 27,000 word short story. OK, that's more like a novella. It's about a young woman who figures out that cosplay can be an excuse to spend four days naked and crawling all over cute boys. Her costume ... Slavegirl Belinda, who makes Slave Leia look overdressed!

In which we discover that Penny Edwards wore a REALLY tight bitgag in the 1952 film "Pony Soldier," leading us to some ruminations about whether or not modern actresses are "pimpin' da bondage" when promoting their movies.

In our continuing coverage of firsts in bondage in mainstream media, we've updated our story on Law and Order: Special Victims Unit's achievement as having the first panty gag on mainstream TV. Not only that, the first nude panty gag. Now, that's dedication!

In our review of the Skinamax flick Testing the Limits we introduce the concepts of the Reluctant Sensitive Guy and Lurking Heavy Plot. On the bright side, Lorissa McComas gets bound and gagged and naked, though not all at once.

The Flash Gordon TV series on the SciFi Channel is best known for not doing ANYTHING well. So, how did THIS scene happen?

Does the Skinamax classic called "Over the Wire" contain the raunchiest bondage scene in mainstream films? YOU decide! (Female lead Griffin Drew seems to have liked it.)

(Featuring a page of gratuitous package display "for the ladies.")

John Willie's Sweet Gwendoline hit the big screen in the guise of hottie Tawny Kitaen at her hottest, and the bondage was plentiful and good. But the writingand acting were ... not.

"Women's Murder Club," a TV series aimed at the crazy cat lady demographic presents the first breather gag seen on network TV. Way to go, crazy cat ladies!

In a Golden Oldie review from Jollyroper days, we present "Roman Scandals of 1934," a black and white epic that features a nudie bondage layer cake in ancient Rome. We are not making this up!

What if karma really worked? With so many missed opportunities and so much bad bondage, there are several movies and TV shows that WOULD exist, if only ...

Buffy the Vampire Slayer's "Dead Things" episode had a beautiful shot to develop some real drama, or humor, and definitely some DiD action. Came right up to the gate ... and balked. We explain why and how.

Another review from Jollyroper days, "Dangerous Attraction," an erotic thriller that had a nice duct tape bondage scene -- but it promised, oh, so much more!

We tripled the number of examples of Wonder Woman's bondage competitors in last week's Wonder Woman article because, well, it's fun snarking on those old comics. Click on the pic to go to the index for the section, or click here to go right to the first new example.

Hentai have finally begun to work their slimy tentacles into American mainstream media (and about time, we say!) as the ecchi "Eiken" invades the Encore Aciton cable channel.

Talk shows are breaking out in an unprecedented wave of bound and gagged scenes, including a nude bondage scene for Chelsea Handler! What the heck is going on around here?

Eurohottie Tina Aumont stars in the first-ever shibari bondage scene in a US mainstream movie in Lifespan, but it's not porn, it's SCIENCE dammit. Science! (Cue Thomas Dolby.)

Elke Sommers wore a crotchrope and none was seen again in movies for four decades. Weird. Essay, R

Tina Louise made a bit of television history before she got that role about the guy in the white hat on the island. Essay, R

"Bondage by Genre, 1-2-3/ It's as easy to learn as your A-B-Cs." Easier, actually, and a lot more fun. And a lot more illustrated.. Essay, R.

The creators of Terminal Virus, a Roger Corman sci-fi schlockfest, came up with what is undoubtedly one of the most brilliant sexual bondage scenarios I have ever encountered anywhere. Then ... they TOTALLY blew it. Review, R.

This is a terrible story, very badly told. It's almost too stupid for words. But we'll try ... Essay, R.

An article examining why attendees at Dragoncon feel free to express themselves sexually. Essay, PG.

Britney Spears' announcement of virginity leads to some thoughts on the true reason for her celebrity: she's not that much of a singer, but she's a great sexual avatar. Essay, PG.

What is it that makes one woman become an accountant and another become a bondage model? Could the answer in part be that some women are born with -- pornbodies? Essay, R.

In Imbalance of Power, we teasingly promised -- or obliquely threatened, as some call it -- to explain how you can make exciting, interesting movies that involve sexual power imbalances by focusing on character. Here's that explanation. Part of the Power Relationships series. Essay, R.

A little fun inspired by an image from the movie "Saving Silverman." Humor, G.

Today's movie genres don't make important distinctions between types of films, such as exploding-car versus non-exploding-car action movies. We're here to help. Humor, PG.

In which I discover that Bobbie Phillips' butt has more power than my entire brain put together. She also has a great rack and huge eyes. It's just not fair! Humor, PG.

The funny thing about Damsel in Distress scenes is, they're not really for the wimpy femmes that the stereotype calls for. Action heroines work much better. Essay, R.

Generally, if you're looking at a woman with her legs secured this far apart, from this angle, she's naked and you're watching bondage porn ... Some thoughts on futuristic bondage imagery. Part of the Futuristic Bondage series. Essay, R.

An episode of the series "Birds of Prey" shows how futuristic bondage SHOULDN'T be handled, and prompts more thoughts on the nature of futuristic bondage imagery. Part of the Futuristic Bondage series Essay, R.

Images of women wearing kink suits are fairly common in movies and on TV, but the obvious accessory -- a ballgag -- is quite rare. What's up with that? Essay, R.

A sexy French maid fantasy pops up in an unexpected venue. Essay, R.

A circa-1920 photo demonstrates that our forebears were hip to bondage pleasures. Essay, R.

A defunct fantasy TV series REALLY pushed the envelope on thongs, and we were there to (literally) record it. Humor, R.

Why bondage scenes in mainstream movies and television scenes (as opposed to the imagery of commercial bondage erotica) is fascinating and revealing. Essay, PG.

There are some scenes even Meryl Streep couldn't act her way out of. Humor, PG.

It seems there's a little-known secret to making a woman's face beautiful that's NEVER been revealed before! And WE got to to it first! Humor, and a very hard R rating.

The Lifetime Channel and the Lifetime Movie Network are always on the prowl for stories of victimized women and crazed men. So how did it miss these true-life stories? Humor, PG.

The nature and locations of a woman's piercings provide clues that will help an observant fellow create a successful strategy to score in the sack. Humor, R.

Why the female lead of this film should receive an award for Best Use of Tits and Ass in a Raunchy Motion Picture. Humor, R.

What if Law and Order: Special Victims Unit featured a time-travel episode or two? It might go something like this ... Humor, PG.

The horrors to be found lurking in cyberspace are truly such as to leave one gibbering in eldritch horror. Humor, G. Illustration, R.

This movie asks the question, how low can the exotic bellydancing slavegirl mythos go? And the answer is, pretty durned low. Humor, R.

When soldiers go on wargame training, sometimes they need volunteers to play the cute females they might capture. Here's how the call for a volunteer might go ... Humor, PG.

A few tasty quotes from some of my favorite movie reviewers. Humor, PG.

A review of the movie "Act of Vengeance" in which we point out why it and several movies are so creepy, in an unintentional sort of way. Essay, R.

A demo video of 3D animation technology from 1999 shows that the potential for 3D hentai is much closer than we thought.. Essay, PG, Illustration, R..

A movie whose major achievement is that it features the most-raped little sister ever in the history of B-movies. We'll leave it to you to judge whether or not that's a good thing. Humor, R.

The pierced female figurine in bondage you see before you was used to cast ... love spells ... over 2,300 years ago in Egypt. .The more things change, the more they stay the same. Info, PG.

An informal survey of a discussion group garners some interesting differences between non bondage fans and bondage fans. Info, PG.

In some U.S. states, in fact most of them, there was a window of time where it was legal to rape your wife, but you could get committed to an asylum for consensually tying her up during sex. Go figure. Info, R.

A review of "Fast Sofa" prompts some thoughts on this theme. There are so few scenes featuring head harnesses that we have most of them vidcapped in the article. Honest. Info, PG.

Why sex and bondage don't get no respect in mainstream films and TV shows, and why commercial porn DOES respect them in ways the mainstream does not. Features the infamous Table of Horribleness. Info, R.

An examination of the real-life technology issues involved in the building of mechanical women for sexual purposes, written as a public service so I won't have to watch Pinocchio ver. 5007.b118 in the future. There are some good stories to tell, if you have a clue. Here are several. Info, R.

Ask not for whom the bell tolls. Just keep those damn censors away from ME! Essay, G.

Janeane Garafolo's observational humor, habit of wearing bondage-ish accessories and interest in body image leads to the usual wild speculation. Celebrity, R.

Susan MacDougal's frequent appearances in chains and cuffs may have had a few unintended consequences. Celebrity, R.

Television actress Alex Meneses takes a vacation in the land of soft-core bondage fun and really steams up the screen. Celebrity, R.

Jennifer Connelly's recent Oscar win is a milestone for celebrity sex scenes in movies everywhere, even though the picture she won it for didn't have any hot sex scenes. Celebrity, R.

Staring at covers of old fantasy novels isn't generally considered a good way of finding evidence of time travel. Which is why no one does it. Except us. Celebrity, Humor, R.

We're hoping you don't buy the extremely silly notion that the traditional image of the valentine heart comes from the human heart. There's a bit of anatomy that MUCH more closely resembles it. Essay, R.

We take lipstick for tranted as a normal facial adornment nowadays. But can you imagine the effect it must have had for the first woman to color her lips labia red? Essay, R.