While converting my huge collection of VHS tapes to DVD format, I ran across a XXX women in prison movie that I did not know I possessed, “The Women of Cell Block F.” Naturally, I had to give it a look. What I saw astounded and alarmed me as no other women in prison movie ever has, not even “Desert Passion,” the incredibly-misleadingly-titled story of women held as sex slaves in a prison that appeared to be a remote Motel 6 in the desert, the first entrant in the No-Bondage Zone on the old Jolly Roper website.
At least “Desert Passion” bereft of bondage as it was, had a prison!
The prison pool from Desert Passion. OK, perhaps not the norm in non sex slavery prisons .
“The Women In Cell Block F” had no cells. It did not have Cell Blocks A, B, C, D, E and most shockingly, F! It did not even have a prison!
That's because as the movie begins, we see the women of Cell Block F LEAVING prison. They exit through a pretty little wrought-iron gate flanked on either side by a chest-high brick wall covered with ivy. No chain fencing, no razor-wire, no nothing. Someone must have heard the term “country club prison” and taken it literally.
Prisongate ... this time it's an ACTUAL gate! Vidcap from Women of Cell Block F.
Thereafter “The Women in Cell Block F” is all about , well, recidivism. Because the first thing the women in the van do when they get out is go to a nice field and have public sex. One prisoner masturbates, one gets done by a guy, and two others enjoy a little strap-on action.
I'm not kidding, outdoor sex, right out of prison. Vidcap from Women in Cell Block F. Authentic video smear!
I mean, this is RIGHT OUT OF PRISON, before they go ANYWHERE ELSE, like HOME. In short, they publicly do something that will land them right back in prison if they're caught at it, and believe me, nobody posted a lookout. Even if they had, it's probably hard to see anything with your face smushed down in the grass or your vision obscured by a guy's stomach moving back and forth at extremely close range.
I mean, if they'd just found a crash pad and had lots of hot 70s sex INSIDE it, that would make sense. Who doesn't want to get laid after a long dry spell in prison? But … in PUBLIC? Well, it WAS the late 70s/early 80s, before they had sex offender registries for so much as leering in public. Free love and all that. Thinking about it, our modern prison-oriented America would have had grounds to arrest EVERYONE who attended Woodstock on some charge or another It was a different time, a time before we had thought up laws against everything except working overtime and going to church..
Later, there ARE scenes from the prison, a few flashbacks of sex between prisoners and guards, starting out kinda non-consensual and then getting enthusiastically consensual in that 70s way. In fact, the movie's next to last scene is an irony-laden tryst between a female prison guard and two male prison guards. I guess with the hotties gone, they had nobody around to rape so they had to make do with pretending to rape one another. Kind of sad, really.
You have to hand it to the people that made “The Women of Cell Block F.” To have the gall to give a movie a title that clearly and unequivocally indicates it is a women in prison movie and then situate it almost entirely outside the prison – that's a rare combination of fiendishly cruel (disappointing all those women in prison movie fan), and dog stupid (since it didn't attract the people who might have been ATTRACTED to the movie because of it's actual content).
A XXX film entitled “Hot Prison Babes Freed and Going Wild!” might have some appeal for the people who bought/rented the tape.. But as I've pointed out in previous articles, the people who make porn films, both softcore and hardcore, have a weird tendency to mislabel their films, so much so that the best word to search for if you want to find a hot bondage scene in collection of porn titles is "Gigolo." And one of the WORST words to search for if you want to find a film featuring large breasted women is "Busty." So I guess leaving the prison out of Women in Cell Block F is just a matter of staying true to their porn roots. Represent, homeporn!
Perhaps the best story about a consensual bondage relationship from any softcore porn series (don't worry, they still flub the story totally in the end -- perhaps "least rotten" is a better descriptor than "best."). Title: Women: Stories of Passion -- The Gigolo.
Of course, one must also examine the possibility that the director/writer didn't give a tinker's damn what the movie was ABOUT so long as its format did not in any way interfere with the characters having sex onscreen a lot. Certainly, that would explain why the plot was so paper-thin it did not bear so much as a moment's scrutiny. Fortunately, the actresses bear a LOT of scrutiny, though the smeary images on my ancient copy of a copy of a 30-year-old VHS tape took much of the pleasure out of that.
Yes, you're looking directly at a woman's vagina, but just try and find it underneath all that video smear. Also, check out those nails! There's a word for how a woman masturbates with nails like that: carefully! Image source: vidcap from Women of Cell Block F.
In its present condition, Women of Cell Block F is only valuable as a fossil, the dead remnant of what came before. But much can be learned from this fossil about the thought process and culture that created it. For example:
1) The creators of the film clearly thought that portraying prison rape as a happy fun time for all concerned was an OK thing to do.
2) Apparently, they were uninterested in all the standard women in prison tropes: shower scenes, violence, violent rapes, bondage, submission and dominance, humiliation, gang fights, and, well ... prisons. I'm going to come right out and say it ... Women in Cell Block F was a budgie job! A budgie job (my own invented term based on this Monty Python pet shop skit's term for a pet animal that has been converted to another kind of pet animal through extremely crude surgery -- like stapling wings onto a hamster and calling it a budgie.
In the case, the filmmaker had a film of women fucking in a park but I guess whoever was distritibuting it wanted a film about women in prison, so they filmed them walking out a gate at some hotel or club or something, made themselves a fake prison cell door and filmed part of a couple of vanilla sex scenes with some actors in uniform, shot partly through the fake door, and blammo! Bob's yer uncle, they have a women in prison movie, without, well, a prison. I don't have any EVIDENCE that this is what happened, except for the movie itself, which is what we call "damning evidence."
2) Portraying pison rape as happy fun time for all was clearly was an OK thing to do, as I never heard of any protests over the film. Of course, it could easily have gone unnoticed, but that's the point -- it WASN'T noticed.
3) Films like Women of Cell Block F probably explains why feminists of the late 70s and early 80s were tearing out their hair in frustration and running around like their hair was on fire both at the same time, because stuff like this was going unnoticed. Understandable!
Possibly they were distracted by all the Sex Wars that were going on at the time. Image source: UltimateSurrender.com.
4) While I get the principle that an imprisoned person is not in a position to say "no" if a guard decides to have sex with her, and therefore any sex IS rape, it's also likely that some prisoners DO use sex as a way to get better treatment while incarcerated, especially those women imprisoned, as many are, for prostitution. If you have used sex to make your existence outside prison more comfortable (and hey, don't we all, one way and another?) then using sex to make your existence inside prison more comfortable does not seem to be much of a stretch. So the consensual looking sex in Women of Cell Block F may be a lot closer to the norm than the lurid rape fantasies you see in most women in prison films. Ironic!
For the record, this is a lurid prison rape scene including bondage, skilfully done by the folks at Sex and Submission. They know their lurid!
Other than that, Women of Cell Block F does not have that much to teach us, as it's basically a bunch of vanilla sex scenes strung together with the flimsiest of plotting material ... muscles of cotton balls, sinews of tissue paper. It goes back to a time when the plot of a porn movie was not just the sex acts performed in it, and exposes the hazy, mindless fantasies of porn directors, instead of the modern laser-like focus on the sex acts performed. But even that can be informative.
*because it's the only one!
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